The ungroomed bride

There is something very jarring about Katie Holmes' wedding pictures. She was quite clearly stooping. She may well have been standing in a hole. But it's not the continually changing height discrepancy between her and Lil' Tom that bothers me - it's the spacky fringe-thing.

Since she arrived in Italy , there has been some very peculiar stubby fluff jutting from Ms Holmes' browline. It reminds me of the fringe my five-year-old babysitting charge Katherine hacked for herself with a pair of kiddie scissors. It also makes her look a bit like a monkey.

Now there is somebody else in that family whose looks lean toward the chimpy (I'm allowed to say this, because although my junior crowning glory didn't quite compare to Suri's flowing locks, I resembled a baby monkey when I was born. My parents' friend nicknamed me "bog brush"). After all the speculation, it is obvious from looking at Suri that she is genetically predisposed to both moping around with Pacey AND playing beach volleyball with Goose. But as gorgeous and of unquestionable parentage as she undoubtedly is, the kid is more than a little fuzzy.

Maybe Katie is bravely trying to make her daughter feel more comfortable about her enviable barnet? Even so, it doesn't explain why she didn't bother doing the rest of her hair for the wedding. Aside from the spacky fringe-thing, it looks like she's gone straight from doing the dusting - a look that my mother disparagingly refers to as "scragged back". Good job Posh wedged her melons into a comedy frock to detract attention.