So... hi!

Well, this is very exciting! My first post. To be honest, I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing, but I have been told that setting up a blog is a piece of piss, and that a retard could do it. Ooh, straying into controversial territory already.

So, welcome to this post on this blog that I think I just built.

If you are reading this, it probably means that you are Andrew and you are here because I told you to read it. Hi, Andrew! *waves*

If you are reading this and you are NOT Andrew, well, you probably got lost somewhere. But hey, it's cold outside and it's not a great time of year to be wandering about. Why not come in, sit down, have a cuppa, and I'll tell you all about why I have decided to set up this particular forum of communication.

You see, my friend Andrew, otherwise known as Drew, is in New Zealand. He's writing a book and I kind of want to keep in with him, because I reckon it'll be quite good and boy, am I going to be pissed off if I just spent years of my life looking at him eating economy pasta in the same goddamn jeans, only to lose touch just when he hits the big time.

No sir. There will be none of that.

Andrew, otherwise known as Drew, is a blogger himself. You may know of him. He's been slacking off with it a little recently, what with the book and all, but I'm not going to complain about that because, like I said, no point falling out with him now.

So, it is very difficult to share all the pissy little details of your life when you're in different time zones, but Andrew is my friend and I need to share the pissy little details of my life with him.

Yes, I could email, but this looks prettier and, who knows, maybe you'll get a kick out of it, too.

To be honest, I was going to set this blog up two months ago. That's when he left, you see. But I never quite got around to doing it, and to be honest, I make out like I'm a great friend but I'm actually arse bastard lazy.

So, why now, I hear you cry, you lost little internet surfer person somewhere in Pontyprith. Would you like a macaroon, by the way?

Well, I found out that some of my friends had arranged to go out without me. And my reaction was to messenger Andrew so he could send back one of those smileys that's like -huh!, and rolling its eyes. But then I realised I don't have messenger anymore, and even if I did, Andrew is in New Zealand and is therefore probably asleep, or maybe creeping around someone's parents' house with a hot actor from Saturday Night Fever (hi Chris!).

And I thought, you know what would be nice. It would be nice if, tonight, when I am asleep and it is daytime on the other side of the world, if Andrew could read about these people who forgot to ask me if I'd like to join in, and think: "Pfft. Tossers."